I've just got this question that keeps nagging me.
You know when you're in the middle of sex, you know, saying things like "Oh - Oh, I'm the best, I'm the best", and you're thinking maybe you should start thru-play, which is almost foreplay, but you're too far gone to really give a shit, and it's really just that you want some place new to put your hands so as to divert your partners attention away from the fact that you're watching re-runs of the Brady Bunch, and realising how attractive Mummy Brady is - much more than the woman from Partridge Family, although Jeannie wasn't too bad either, and what with all the TV and everything, you've completely forgotten about the microwave, which you put the massage oil in to warm it up because it's the only method you know to score, having read it about 20 times in Penthouse Forum, only you didn't get to try it, she initiated the situation (which in reality IS the only way you score, which is like scoring by default or at least dysfunction), but the oil's now bioling, and it's about 10% alcohol, so it gives that athletic sting when you spill it down your Y- fronts trying to sneak it past your parents into your room - so the oil catches fire in the microwave, meanwhile you're still going "You've never met anyone like me, I'm so dynamic" etc etc, and you hear the bang as the microwave explodes all over the "Advanced Relativity Theory" you left in the kitchen to make the girl you picked up think you were a real brain, although, not the sort that thinks all the time, the one that's naturally a brain and an all- round sportsman to boot - and you think the bang is just her coming (you're THAT inexperienced) so the next bang as the oil fired central heating pops off just makes you think that you're in multiple territory. You both get roasted because her screams of terror you just put down to your huge manliness, and think the heats just natural, given the fact you weigh 57 stone and haven't had a workout in your life.
Anyway back to the question, would you want to be buried or cremated?